Oh the fun
by golden1willow
Summary: Yumira was a sneaky one. She could slip in and out of a village with ease. She was a cunning girl that could pull off almost anything. That's why she was in the Akatsuki. Though, they weren't expecting to be the victims of her awesome skills. plz REVEIW cause my first few posted stories r gonna be like practice stories.
1. Chapter 1

Paste your document here...

Another story of torchure! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA!

Henzu: but you have'nt even posted the next chapter of Owls yet! And you still haven't worked on the original story!

ME: that doesn't mean they're not progressing... Now do the disclaimer!

Henzu: No!

ME: oh Kitten!

Kitten: *makes puppy eyes* Please Henzu? For me?

Henzu:...O/O...fine...

ME and Kitten: YAY!

henzu: Golden1willow does not own Naruto or Naruto shippuden... she only owns her ocs...*weeps in corner*

Yomaru: *barges in* ALRIGHT! LETS GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD!

Kitten: Papa what are you doing here?

yomaru: I'm gonna give this show some spice!

Everyone: oh no!

* * *

Yumira Uchiha walked down the torch lit halls of an Akatsuki hideout. She followed Pein to meet the rest of the Akatsuki members. Pein felt her eyes burning the back of his head like a friggn' lazer.

"Is there something wrong?"

Yumira waited a little, nodding her head as if deciding something before saying, "You're tall."

"that's not really something you should be worried about right now…"

But she was. Although Pein wasn't Juugo tall, he fell into the tall category. He was probably a foot taller than herself. Yumira soon found herself wanting to grab his orange hair. But he was a ninja, and a pretty dominant one at that. He probably didn't want her touching his hair, let alone grabbing it, and would try to stop her hand. But then again, she was a dominant ninja too; if she wanted to grab someone's hair she'll find a way to do it. Just the fact that she was thinking about this pronounced she was weird…. Very weird indeed…

Just as she was reaching out, Pein opened the door to a large room. Within it were seven, dudes. One of them had an orange swirly mask on with only one eye hole, and there was another that was ugly and hunched over like some seriously old guy.

"So these guys are the Akatsuki?"

"There are four more."

"Oh. Would any of them happen to girl by any chance? I don't feel comfortable being an only girl."

"Yes."

" That's cool…"

The haunched over dude scowled, "Why must you insist on pairing me with brats?"

Yumira took offence from what he said, "Hey! Who are you calling a brat?!"

"You."

"You wanna go, old guy?!" she challenged with threatening gestures.

"You'll have that soon enough." Pein interrupted. "This is Uchiha, Yumira, she will be joining the Akatsuki from now on."

"Hey guys."

There was another tall guy, he was blue and had some freaky eyes; very shark-looking, "Well, would you look at that! Yet another Uchiha."

'Heh heh… he has a funny voice'

"But first she must pass a test."

"UUUUUUUgh…." The Uchiha's jaw dropped. She was too tired for tests!

Pein turned towards her, "You will be faced against Deidara and Sasori over there," he said, gesturing towards the rather rude, ugly guy, and a girly lookin' blonde dude.

Yumira cracked her knuckles as everyone else got back, "Bring it on! I'll mess up your faces even more!"

"Begin."

The blonde stepped forward, "Prepare to experience true art, un!"

His partner looked at him, "you're not going on about that again are you?" The blonde smirked, "True art is a brilliant burst of beauty that lasts only but a second before vanishing."

"You fool. You call that idiocy art? True art is lasting gracefully against time; beautifully preserved forever."

"That's absurd, yeah,"

"You're absurd,"

"Your face is absurd, un,"

"your existence is absurd,"

"Your view on art is absurd, un,"

"Deidara, are you trying to make me angry?"

"Am I, yeah,?"

"Perhapse whether you live or not will answer that." The ugly guy growled.

"You're arguments get pretty intense huh." The uchiha interrupted. She was on the ceiling with her sharingan activated, though her facial expression was as relaxed and lazy as ever.

Sasori turned towards her, "Come down here, girl, so we can get this over with. I have things to do."

"Why don't you come up here and get me?"

"Do you take me for a fool?" a metal tail came from Sasori's backside and pressed down on one of the clear wires Yumira had set. Its movement triggered the movement of others, revealing the whole room to be boobie-trapped.

"you're a pretty observant guy, congratulations." She clapped. Deidara shoved his hands into some pouches hidden under his cloak, "My art can easily maneuver through this trap of yours." He brought up two clenched fists and opened them to reveal two small clay birds in each hand.

He threw them out and they poofed into larger, more detailed versions of themselves and began flying through the net of wire.

Yumira's bored expression didn't change, "Well… this isn't good…"

"Katsu!"

The birds exploded once they'd reached Yumira. But much to the blonde's displeasure a fried log came flying out of the flames.

"Damn substitution jutsu!"

"Deidara, you'll never get her like that," Sasori growled, "we'll have to dispose of this nuisance first."

…

Yumira watched patiently as the two art obsessed Akasuki members made their move. The blonde launched another bird, but it was fat and sturdy, carefully and slowly walking through the net until its foot caught on one of the wires, then it froze completely. Suddenly Sasori cut one of the wires with his tail, and the whole net snapped around the bird tightly, sinking into it a little before exploding with a bright burst of light.

3 hours later

Deidara finally collapsed to the ground tired and huffing. He'd already been low on chakra when all of this began, from the looks of it, so had sasori.

This strange girl seemed to be toying with them sometimes, too; she'd fight, hide somewhere, pop back out again, make some unnecessary comment, be caught, escape, hide, pop out and fight, and do other annoying sequences.

Sasori had even gotten himself caught in the headhunter jutsu. Not so tough now is he!?

"Fuel of shadows!" Yumira called out as she formed various hand-signs. The blonde got up quickly to shield himself, but instead of any impact, he was covered in a black, strong smelling liquid. It was gasoiline!

Yumira formed more hand signs, "Fire style:-"

"Deidara! Get out of the way you fool!" Sasori warned. Yumira continued, " Fireball jutsu!"

But before she could set the panicing blonde aflame, Pein's voice rang out, "Enough!"

"She was gonna fry me, un!"

Pein continued" Yumira, you have proven yourself-" the Uchiha was on the floor growling in pain.

"You bastard…" she looked up to reveil her slit-shaped pupils, "Why did you make me back up all that chakra?! Do you know what happens when you activate the fireball jutsu and don't use it? All that chakra goes to your stomache! That crap figging hurts!" suddenly she threw up o the floor, but all that came out was water… lots and lots of water.

"Aw… funnel bags…" and she threw up even **_more_** water.

She quickly stood up and wiped her mouth, as if she weren't standing in a giant puddle of puked water, and walked out of the toward the door, "I'm gonna take a shower…" and closed the door.

…

As Yumira walked down the hall she held her arm. She hadn't noticed its injury before.

Suddenly none other than Pein appeared.

"sir?"

The orange haired leader just turned around walked. She figured he wanted her to follow so she did.

…

Sasori groaned as he pulled himself out of the ground. His face was all cracked, and held an expression that said he was in a bad mood…. If you could distinguish that from his normal expression.

"Did you enjoy being a stick in the mud Danna?"

"Shut it brat. I wasn't about to become some baked pottery. We both know full well that we're dangerously low on chakra. I can barely move as it is."

Deidara slipped on the oil that still covered him head to toe when someone he hated more than Sasori walked by. "You two are a mess. Go clean yourselves," came the voice of Itachi. He'd seen the entire battle as well as the destruction of his reputation. There's no doubt he'd say something about this.

" Itachi," sasori interrupted the unspoken argument, "You said you eliminated your entire clan; why is there still an uchiha scattering around?"

Itachi stopped just before crossing the thresh hold of the door. He spoke in a barely noticeable voice, "It seems I've missed one."


	2. Meeting teh members 1

Sorry it been a while. I've been busy.

Disclaimer: i don't own naruto. Just my ocs

BLA

* * *

…. Name: Yumira Uchiha

Age: 19

Looks: Black, pupil less, lazy eyes with a reddish tint, black hair in a low, loose ponytail, long scar across face from left eyebrow to right cheek.

(: _She's in the cover image :)_

The next day.

Yumira entered Peins office the next morning. She'd already received her cloak and ring wasn't wearing them at the moment. "Please excuse me sir, but you called for me?"

Pein looked up from some papers on his desk. She noticed there was someone else in the room. It was one of the akatsuki guys from earlier. He kinda looked like the unbent-over version of the Sasori; furrowed eyes, mean, scowling expression, mask…

He had green eyes though, and red sclera and his skin was a darker, brownish tint, like he was black… but wasn't… somehow.

"This is Kakuzu. He will show you around the hidout," the guy stepped forward and walked out the door, "Come with me."

Yumira followed him down the halls of the hideout. It was a long, silent, agonizing walk…. Okay it was only three minutes, but still agonizing! Finally they turned down a hallway with many doors.

"Here is where our rooms are. Each team of Akatsuki members shares a room." When they came to a door with scratches all over it he said, "This is my room, do not enter without permission." Yumira was studying the scratches on the door. They were very interesting marks. Some even looked like pictures….. very violent pictures.

"Whoa…. Heinous dude."

"Yumira did you hear me?"

" What? Oh… Yeah. Yeah I heard ya."

Suddenly there was a loud crashing noise that sounded like a body hitting the floor, then after a few thumps of feet, the handle to the door started shaking violently as if someone was trying to get out.

"KAKUZU! LET ME OUT! YOU THINK THIS IS FUNNY?!" a male voice yelled from the other side. Though it sounded more fearful than angry.

"NO! STAY BACK!" the panicking guy yelled again but it seemed to be directed to some in the room.

Kakuzu pushed yumira forward as the banging on the door got louder and more rapid. "There's nothing to see here. Lets continue."

When they walked a little farther the door burst off its hinges and slammed against the wall and someone ran out. But black, string-like things grabbed his legs and dragged his back in like a scene in a horror movie.

The strings replaced the door and the screaming continued.

"What was that about?"

"That's what happens when you wake up late."

"Oh."

They continued down the hall and Kakuzu told her which rooms were who's and which she shouldn't go into.

"And here's your room, which you'll be sharing with Sasori and Deidara." Suddenly another door burst off it's hinges. This time a guy with spikey, white hair and amber eyes.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to break the doors down?" Kakuzu complained. Though the guy didn't seem to be listening. His eyes were darting to each of the doors as if looking for something before locking his eyes on Kakuzu's room door, "AAAHAAAA!" he said before ripping the door from its hinges again and diving into the room. After a few seconds of silence he came back out, gently pushing a girl out with him, "Just go to the kitchen and get something to eat, okay Ora?"

The girl looked to be around 15 years old. She had long black hair that went down to her feet and covered her face except her left eye, which was purple and half closed.

Kakuzu crossed his arms, "You ruined my fun, Yomaru."

The snowy haired member turned to him and opened his mouth to speak when he noticed there was someone he didn't recognize in his presence. He ran up to Yumira and held out his hand in greeting.

"HI, THERE! YOU MUST BE THE NEW MEMBER I'VE HEARD ABOUT."

Yumira took his hand in hers with a smile, "Aye that is sir."

"My name is Yomaru, but you can call me Yoma! It's nice to meet ya!" he said with a firm hand shake and a hearty laugh.

"You can call me Yumi."

Suddenly she heard a voice behind her, "It nice to finally meet you, Yumira Uchiha."

Yumi's blood suddenly turned to ice when she realized it was the girl from Kakuzu's room. How did she get behind her? The girl brought her head up from a respectful bow. Yumira froze completely when she noticed Ora's hair was _moving. "A few words of advice… __**Hidan is mine…"**_

"Whodan?"

Ora shot a glare that completed the ghostly atmosphere, causing Yumira to laugh nervously.

"Hahahaahahaha, Ithinkweshouldgonowdon'tyou?" it all came out so quickly, it was barely understandable.

As Kakuzu lead her further down the hallway, Yumi felt the other two members vanish and let out a relived sigh.

"So,… why couldn't Deidara or Sasori be my escorts, ya know, since I'm on their team?

"They're busy."

"With what?"

"Recuperating. They'd just come back from a mission when you arrived. It surprises me they were able to hold out for three full hours."

"Oh," Yumi scratched her head sheepishly, "you saw that?"

Several times during the battle she had silpped, hit her head on something, or tripped on stupid things… like her pant sleeves.

"You were quite pathetic." The Uchiha could've sworn he was smiling behind his stupid little mask.

"Yeah? Well… YOU try fighting in the middle of the night when you're tired 'cause you didn't sleep for two days." She said pointing a challenging finger at him. Suddenly a pleasing smell filled the nostrils of the newly recruited teen.

"Oh, my gosh. Is that food I smell?"

Kakuzu could have sworn something whacked his leg just before she darted off to track down the smell. Reacting quickly, he launched his hand and grabbed the back of Yumi's shirt just before she turned the corner.

Completely ignoring the fact that what he'd just done was inhumanly creepy as she was dragged back down, Yumira let herself plop back down next to… what's his name again? Kazuwi?

"What's up?"

"What was that?"

"What was what?"

"Something just hit my leg."

"…"

"…"

"…"

"Jee… that food sure smells good."

"Don't change the subject."

"Look. I don't know, okay?"

"You're ever so paling face says otherwise."

"…"

"…"

And with that she took off down the hall at full speed. She just HAD to let a little major hunger make her forget to watch where she swipes this thing. Curse that Forty-eight hour chase through the woods!

"Come back here!"

"No!"

"YUMIRA!"

"You can't make me!"

Ah. If only she knew.

Suddenly a hand shot out of the floor, making her jump up out of its reach. The s-rank criminal took the chance to grab the back of her shirt once more and proceed dragging her down the hall, "Let's talk about this during breakfast shall we?"

"You're lucky I haven't eaten in two days either." The Uchiha groaned over her grumbling stomach.

"Hn."

She continued to be dragged across the floor and into what she assumed was a kitchen. Immediately she was greeted by a familiar, hearty voice.

"GREETINGS, FAIR LAD AND LADY!"

"Hey cool guy."

"Why is Kazuwi dragging you across the floor?"

"For the hundredth time, it's KAKUZU not Kazuwi." Said Kakuzu as he went through the fridge.

Yumi, who was still in his firm grip, however went, "Kakuzaku… got it."

"Are you all hard of hearing?"

…

"Hurry up, Deidara!" the low, husky voice of teh puppet master as he slithered through the door to the infirmary.

"Hold on, un!" said the blonde, but only receive yet another vicious growl.

"Why do you even need to come in here, yeah?"

"That's none of your business, brat."

The blonde tried to get out, but a metal tail whacked him the rest of the way. They were both in a bad mood, but mostly Deidara.

There was yet another Uchiha in the Akatsuki, and she was on HIS team.

Great.


	3. the Mask!

I know it's been a while, but my computer broke and now I've had to rewrite all of the next chapters that I've been working on for my other stories. – 3-

I don't own Naruto just my ocs

Um…

* * *

Yomaru soon left the small kitchen.

Through the art of 'mouth-stuffing' Yumira had avoided Kakuzu's question thus far, however, when she tried to make a run for she ended up tied up on the floor.

"Dude, let… me… go!"

"Answer. My. Question."

"Inchworm-no-Jutsu!"

The Uchiha suddenly started crawling towards the door like an inchworm, but was dragged back and sat in her chair, "This is so uncool."

One look at his burning eyes and Yumi could tell he was getting annoyed. With a defeated sigh, she straightened up in her chair, "Fine. But you can't tell ANYONE about it, got me?"

"It's a deal."

…

Loud on-going screaming could be heard down the hall where a certain pink-eyed Jashinist ran for his immortal life. He dodged the black strings that greedily swung and swiped at him.

"_Where are you going my love_?" a voice echoed from where the black tendrils originated. It scared the criplets out of him.

He quickly went into the nearest room and slammed the door loudly.

"Hidan?"

He whipped his head around to see the tallest man in the akatsuki, "Kisame," Hidan whispered, "help me!" his face was filled with absolute distress.

"Is Ora chasing you again?" asked the giant as he turned and walked over to his desk. He pulled out a small scroll. "Here, it'll mask your chakra and disguise you."

Hidan took the scroll and opened it up.

_poof!_

Hidan suddenly became the tall, blue, shark-eyed giant that Kisame was.

_"__Come out, come out, wherever you are~" Hidan shivered violently before turning to face the door. A light knock came, and hidan felt kisame's chakra vanish. He turned his head to see that he was gone, along with the ninja tools on top of his desk. _

_Hidan opened the door, trying to seem as calm as possible._

_"__Good day, Kisame-san." The ghostly ninja greeted him._

_"__U-hh… g-"_

_"__Is something wrong, Kisame-san?"_

"WHAT? N-nooo. Wh-why would you say something like that? There's nothing wrong… with me." The stumbled and tripped over his words as he wiped away some of the nervous sweat from his forehead.

_"__I cannot feel your chakra. You're acting quite strange as well."_

"Er…"

_"__You are must not feeling well. I shall go to be on my by way."_

She turned to go back down the hall, but just as she was about to disappear into the shadows, she paused,_ "Oh, and if you ever happen to see Hidan… __**tell him that I'm coming for him."**_

…

"Are ya happy now?" 

Kakuzu sat calmly at the table reading the newspaper , "I don't see why it was such a big deal."

"You're the one who wanted to know so badly!"

"I simply feel discomforted when I can't see something that can hit me as hard as that."

Yumira stopped pacing around the room to put her hands on her hips and poke out her lips, "Awww, did a widdle hit hurt?"

"Don't speak to me as if I'm a child."

"Well, you know what? I feel discomforted when I can't see someone SMIRKING."

"What-"

"Off with the mask, Mr. Watermelons."

The man let out a light chuckle before looking back at his paper, "I'm not taking off this mask."

A short stream of silence went through the room before she zipped across the room and pounced on him in under a second, "_I_ sure will!"

…

Several minutes passed.

The two ended up in a situation where Kakuzu was on the floor, trying to keep Yumira out of arms distance of his face while using both his arms and tendrils. It was pretty hard considering she was gripping his cloak with the strength he didn't expect her to have.

Suddenly the door opened and they both froze to see who it was.

He had black hair in a pony-tail with bangs that framed his face, which had two lines on it along with a pair of sharingan eyes.

"Hey," the smaller Uchiha smiled, as if this was perfectly normal. "What're you two doing?" he demanded.

"She assaulting me,"

"Nuh ur,"

"Yes, you are,"

"You're just jealous cause I can tackle you with ease."

"Get off of me."

"Get off the mask!" she attempted a swipe at him.

And they started fighting again. But then Little Zuzu noticed something; Yumira and Itachi look just like ea-

Suddenly Deidara popped out of nowhere, "What's going on here, un?"

"Hey, Deidei."

"I was going to get a sandwhich when I found these two on top of each other."

"Dude. That sounds so wrong…"

"Are you two just going to stand there and watch or help me?" Zuzu growled.

Itachi took a single step forward and said with all his calm glory shining through, "Yumi….. down girl."

Yumira blinked, "Aw, man. You already know don't you?"

The fellow Uchiha simply closed his eyes.

"Cheese." She got off of Kakuzu, and then walked over to hand Itachi a slip of paper, "Tomarrow, first thing."

"Hm."

Quickly whipping back around, she pointed a daring finger at Zuzu, who was currently dusting himself off,

"And _YOU!... _I will get that mask off, one way or another Zuzu!"

End

* * *

Itachi and Yumi do the ending dance

Yumira: Review peeps!


End file.
